Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Nightmare on 13th: Review

I have a dedicated fondness for high intensity situations. I love romance because it's thrilling, I love moving because it's apprehensive and impulsive, and I love baking because it's ambitious and demanding.

I love Halloween because of the unexpected and bizarre, because it is treacherous and risky, and because at no other time and in no other situation would any of the things that occur on, and around Halloween be even remotely realistic or acceptable... precisely, the reason I find Haunted Houses so welcoming.

The problem is: I don't really get scared. Not exactly... I infrequently have a propensity to momentarily lose my cool and allow my perception of reality to become distorted. And I will confess, Inside tops a very short list of scary movies that has ever sent me beyond the curtain of certainty. Though I keep trying-over the past seven years Gabriel and I have visited at least 12 Haunted Houses that I can recall. One of our family traditions is to visit a Haunted House every spooky season, more than one if we are lucky, and I am pleased as punch to finally be able to say,

"Until you've been chased
through a black and white checkered maze
with disorientating lights that not only flash off and on,
but periodically turn on and off,
while being harassed by, laughed at, and spat upon
by unrelenting deranged and insane clowns,
you've never truly patronized a Haunted House."

This is the Haunted House.

(All photos courtesy of Nightmare on 13th)
Nightmare on 13th
300 W. 1300 S.
Salt Lake City, Utah 84115
Monday - Thursday 7:30 pm -10 pm
Friday & Saturday 7:30 pm - 12 am

This is the Haunted House that will affront you with a deluge of stimulating and arrestingly haunting images and villains that will scar your mind and your senses. This is the Haunted House that will intoxicate and cajole you, that will envelop you and spit you out, that will frighten and amuse you. For some, it might even make you cry.

2009 marks the 20th operating year for Nightmare on 13th. USA Today ranked Nightmare as one of the top 13 Haunted Houses in the entire United States, agreeing with Haunted Attraction Magazine, Haunted House Association, Travel Channel and America Haunts. Each year the attraction is updated with scenes and haunts from the years most chilling movies and cultural influences. This year, more than $75,000 dollars was spent in upgrades, revamps, special effects and costumes.

Be prepared for over 40,000 square feet, and a torturous hour of freaky, scary, inhumane, disturbing and disconcerting attractions including a greeting by Freddy Kruger and the Exorcist, having to squeeze your way through fresh intestines, being pushed off a ledge by a collapsing brick wall, navigating a body bag maze, an encounter with the Saw Puppet, Vampirista's claiming that his Master would love another Golden Bride, cold and damp bloody sheets, and maggots.

Nightmare on 13th features the standard Nightmare for $15, and the Xtreme Nightmare for $20. Purchase your ticket online, and save $10! Nachos and candy are found at the end of the show for a fair price ($1.50-3.00) in an eerily lighted room with wandering zombies. Children 8 and under are free, but must be accompanied by an adult.

Sister that Spook Pammy had a different experience involving crying in the parking lot. Want to hear what happened? Scream your way over to her blog post.

Pammy said before,
"No! No! No!
No! No! No!
Pammy said after,
"I thought I was going to
die of hysterics!"

As for me...
I'll be going back to the nightmare tonight - scare you there?

20 Sweet Talkers:

Dreamgirl said...

.... *speachless*

You are certainly a twisted girl! Brave and not easily scared:-)

Just stopping by from SITS to say hi and, I guess, wish you a very scary Wednesday!

love lives in the kitchen said...

Hi! I'm happy to meet you and i like your blog very much!! I'm your new follower!
have a great day!

Design it Chic said...

Hello there! just stopped by from SITS and you have a cute blog!

Happy Wednesday!

parentingBYdummies said...

I spent my Saturday night at a haunted attraction as well. I was scared.

Mary K Brennan said...

No thank you. Looks entirely too scary for me. Nothing does me in like crazy clowns chasing you through a maze.

Momma G.Love said...

Everything scares me! And I absolutely HATE haunted houses.

...stopping by from SITS...

Steph @ Stick It in the Fridge

Evan said...

Wow. I don't do clowns. No thank you. Clowns are pure evil...probably. But I do love a good haunted house! I used to live in Gatlinburg, TN and I worked for Ripley's, which meant I got into all the attractions for free. Ripley's haunted Adventures was one of those. I always enjoyed getting my friends all liquored up and taking them. What a treat! YEAR ROUND!

Carin said...

okay as much as I love Halloween I HATE haunted houses! The clowns at this one were more than enough for me just seeing them on your blog thanks!

Kendahl, Stepmom Extraordinaire said...

I love. LOVE. haunted houses, and Nightmare on 13th is definitely the BEST one there is! The Husband and my first date was at Nightmare on 13th and we make it tradition to go back every year. This year we got to take our 8 year old; that was pretty fun. :)

Two Normal Moms said...

I needed a push to get in Halloween mode - thanks! Your blog is great!
(visiting from SITS)

Jen Sue Wild said...

I love haunted houses.. This one looks really great!!

Stopping by from SITS

Trac~ said...

I love haunted houses but not THIS haunted - I'd been like Pammy out in the parking lot scared to death! HA!

Gretchen said...

That looks like a great haunted house. I like the photo with all the ghouls! I am actually scared of haunted houses, so I won't be going into one anytime soon! I love your blog. Stopping by from SITS. ~Gretchen

Camille said...

No Thank YOU! I'm with Pamela! I like my safe ground - without psychos and sociopaths chasing me around! :)

Barbara said...

Glad I don't live there!
I remember being in a haunted house and having a hand (real) come down on my shoulder. I must have jumped a foot. (I don't think they allow anyone to touch you anymore)
I also seem to remember a really good one on Mackinac Island. Bet it's no longer there.

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